Secrets of family happiness: 6 practical tips
According to statistics, 70–75% of marriages break up. Psychics say that by 2030 this figure will increase even more. In this article, “The Secrets of Family Happiness,” will consider the reasons and tips for creating a strong union between lovers after their marriage has taken place.
To get to know a person, you need to live with him for at least one year and argue a couple of times. Perhaps you have heard such words. But this is by no means true, because at the beginning of all human relationships, we try to flaunt only the positive sides of our essence. It just so happens that a person does not open up right away. Therefore, you understand and know perfectly well that dating a loved one is one thing, but living with him (her) the rest of your life in harmony and happiness is no easy task, especially if you look at statistics.
Most people, especially women, believe that marriage is a holiday. That this is a real fairy tale, just like in cartoons and movies. But the fact is that real life begins after the wedding, and does not end there. “They lived happily ever after” are just beautiful words, but putting them into practice is real human labor, for which both halves are responsible. Yes, human relationships are perhaps the most important component in life. As they say: “Good human relations rule everywhere,” that is, if you know how to get along with people, you will go far in the good sense of the word. You also need to learn to get along with your significant other. If you are able to do this, where do you think you will go? To a world of happiness and harmony, strong union and abundance. We all need this.
The reason for a failed marriage
Before getting married, what should you and I not do? I think the first thing we shouldn't do is rush. People are constantly in a hurry, but time still does not spare us. In other words, you will still get it, sooner or later (for example, get married). Therefore, there is no need to rush things. The second thing you should do is take a close look at your partner. After all, having gotten married, it’s as if you find yourself in another dimension, that is, you begin to see the shortcomings of your other half. You immediately have difficulties, for example, financial problems, problems in mutual understanding, and the most common problem is the division of responsibilities. When a baby is born, all attention is transferred to him (her). The picture is not very cheerful...
It’s better to take a blank piece of paper, a pencil or a pen and write down all the shortcomings, advantages and habits of your soulmate. Ask yourself the main question: “Can I live my whole life with this person?” Take a closer look now so that later it is not too late. Work, interests, attitude to life, topics for communication - all this will help you collect the most complete picture of your partner and then build on that. And then draw conclusions and make concrete decisions.
Secrets of family happiness
Now let's get down to the secrets of family happiness. Both halves should know these secrets, remember and, of course, practice them. Otherwise, this article will be a waste of time, and the secrets of family happiness will be useless.
The first secret is loyalty and trust.
The relationship must be monogamous. Loyalty and trust are the main principles of any family. According to a study by American scientists, 96% of the inhabitants of this country believe that fidelity and trust are the main secret of family happiness . One betrayal may already be fraught with the possibility of building a serious relationship. Therefore, start with this. Discuss the topic of fidelity and trust with your significant other. If you are faithful to each other, then half the battle for a monogamous relationship is done!!!
Secret two - value your soulmate
As mentioned in other articles, we begin to appreciate what we have lost. Although there is nothing to value anymore. I don’t know why this happens, but people don’t value what they have at the moment. Either this is taken for granted, or it is such a formed “default” habit. But it’s better to start forming a new habit now - to appreciate everything that you have now. Appreciating your soulmate is important and necessary, even if you already have some grievances and omissions. You shouldn’t keep it to yourself, otherwise the time will come when you will finally just “explode.” This is where family quarrels begin. But someone has to compromise. And what to do in such a situation when everyone considers themselves right? I believe that at the first quarrel, someone should take the first step forward. This, of course, depends, first of all, on the situation, on the cause of the ensuing scandal. But if the man took the first step towards reconciliation, then next time the other half should take it. I think that's fair. But again, it all depends on the cause of the quarrel.
Let everything be optimal. Talk to your significant other. Talk about your disappointments and perhaps in five minutes you will come to common decisions. In addition, this also builds trust on the part of lovers.
The third secret is correct behavior with everyday life
Yes, sometimes our life is a repetition of the same actions - a routine. Perhaps this is part of our life and there is no escape from it. It's the same in family life. Remember the cartoon “Shrek. Forever". There is a lot to learn from this cartoon. the second secret again Yes, routine is tiring, but what can you do about it? First, initially, right now, accept this as an integral part of your life. This applies not only to you specifically. Absolutely all inhabitants of our globe face this problem. We are just so focused on ourselves that we don’t notice what and how others are doing. You know, sometimes this can be comforting!!!
You shouldn’t live by standard patterns, for example, the wife cooks, the man does the repairs. The woman is a housewife, the man is a money earner. This is not right, especially when you yourself don’t think so. It’s just that society, our society, imposed this idea on you. Let the man cook dinner and the woman relax on the sofa. If a woman likes to walk around the house with a hammer and fix whatever she wants, then a man can join. This can actually become a “family game” and life won’t seem like a routine. The main thing is that both halves have the desire. Well, why not cook breakfast together? Perhaps it will be fun and far from ordinary.
In my opinion this is the way out. What do you think?
Secret four - support
If you want your husband to earn more money or your wife to lose a few kilograms, you shouldn’t nag each other. There is a saying: “Everything that a person achieves is the merit of the people who believe in him.” No need to say that your husband is weak. It’s better to support him in moments of despair, try to give some practical advice, listen to him. But the most important thing is when the support is mutual. That's how she should be. If one of the spouses supports his/her other half, and the other half is used to being listened to and pitied, this will not lead to anything good. Sooner or later, one of the spouses will break down and then a quarrel will not be avoided. A person must know and feel that he is needed not only as a “tool” for meeting needs in the family or for a significant other, but also that he is really needed. This is really inspiring. Therefore, everything should be mutual, remember this.
Secret five - do things together
It's no good when lovers are constantly trying to take a break from each other. Most likely, something is already going wrong. Going on vacation separately, spending weekends separately...
Remember the second secret. Some couples think that they do the right thing when they try, as it were, not to get bored of each other. From one point of view this is correct, from another - something goes wrong. How will you live together? Again, I repeat many times: “Everything must be optimal.” You should take a break from each other, but depending on how you do it. I like to use the Pareto 80/20 law. Think about how much of your time you spend with your significant other, and how much alone with yourself? If 80% is with your significant other, and 20% is alone with yourself, then you are forming a harmonious relationship. But even here everything is not simple. Men and women are different from each other, and deeper knowledge is needed here. I would suggest you read the book by Alan and Barbara Pease - “Why men want sex and women want love.” I assure you, after reading this book, your relationship will reach a new level.
Secret six - time for sex
What can you say about this secret? Intimate life plays a huge role in the relationship between a man and a woman. This requires a lot of effort, especially for men. Why? As a rule, after 5-6 sex with one woman, men lose interest. It's a bitter truth, but it can still be avoided. Another truth is that at the beginning of family life there are no problems with sex, but over the years... I think you yourself understand. What can we offer here?
Experimenting. Take the initiative and “go ahead and sing.” Nowadays, you can come up with a lot of interesting things in your sex life. So you fantasize. The main thing is to want it, and everything else will follow if you believe in it!!!
If you wish, you can leave your comments. Good luck to you!!!
What is the key to family happiness?
It's no secret that the number of divorces has increased sharply recently. What is the reason? Why do young people fail to find a source of family happiness?
The answer is simple. Modern youth take marriage too lightly. A month after they met, the young man and the girl decide that “here it is, love” and run to the registry office. Family life seems like a holiday, but in reality everything turns out to be completely different. A gentle and attentive soulmate suddenly develops annoying habits, problems with money begin, and the couple, tired of constant stress, soon gets divorced. So how can you prevent such a situation and find the secrets of how to build a strong family nest? Here are some tips to help you create a truly strong community unit.
Before you tie the knot with someone, take the trouble to find out everything about that person.
What he loves, what he is interested in, what, on the contrary, irritates him. It is important that you have the same ideas about married life and an ideal family; find out his (her) attitude towards children. “Skeletons in the closet” will not help your relationship become stronger, but knowing the strengths and weaknesses of your chosen one, on the contrary, will teach you to trust him. But trust is one of the most important components of family happiness!
Respect your soulmate
And don't be ashamed to show how much you appreciate him or her. Do you know the famous joke in which a judge gives a woman advice before a divorce to praise her husband more often, to please him, so that later, when he announces his departure, he will hurt him as much as possible? After some time, the judge meets this woman and, when asked if she is going to get a divorce, receives the answer: “What are you talking about! I have the best husband in the world!” The fairy tale is a lie, but there is a hint in it. It has long been known in psychology: if you don’t like the absence of certain qualities in a person, start praising him precisely for the fact that he has them. For example, tell a slob about how clean he is. The person will strive to meet your expectations, and will soon actually become more tidy.
Support each other
Family should be a place where you want to return. It is necessary that in difficult moments your spouse turns to you, and does not run to friends from you, fearing that you will “nag” him.
Stay together all the time
In a good family, spouses cannot be bored together; you must complement each other. If you feel that there are fewer and fewer topics to talk about, try to find a common hobby or do something that you have never done before, but that your spouse likes.
These seemingly simple tips will help you create a strong, happy family. Remember: in order to receive something, you must first give something. Make an effort and it is quite possible that someday your family will become the ideal family for your children.
