Family and money
The mysterious psychology of money will be revealed to us during money training, but for now we will consider in this article only one aspect of the influence of money on us: Money in the family. And if you have a deeper interest in how to make money, and you are ready to listen to a course of lectures about money, then sign up for the “MONEY” training. From a conversation between two friends: - and I told him: You will never take me by force! - And what did he do? — I took out my checkbook.
Money in the family:
Money doesn’t replace happiness, but it helps you get by without it.
Everyday psychology of money.
The cause of money conflicts is not money! We often ask for money when we want love.
A common cause of financial conflicts is not money, but family relationships. We are often ashamed to directly say that the distribution of money in the family is not fair.
Those who earn less enter into alliances with children, competing for power. And they use children to influence the earning spouse.
Worrying about money is like worrying about death: accept its finiteness.
Acknowledge your debts and whose money you live on. Don’t lie that you are free if you live in your parents’ apartment or with your ex-husband’s money.
Impoverished families sometimes take offense not at life, but at each other. Be a team and fight life and society together for success.
Money in families is often a means to teach a lesson: let children or ex-wives experience difficulties...
Poverty is like revenge on parents. It’s more important for me to show them how badly they raised me than to have money.
It is important for adult children to help their parents. Let them have it.
A large inheritance - a meaningless life? Yes, if other values are not instilled, and you no longer need to think about how to make money.
“What is mine is mine, and what is yours is also mine” - secret agreements in families.
Conversation between two friends:
- So you want to get married for money? - God forbid! I just want my future husband to have a pleasant appearance and a cheerful character. And if he doesn't have money, he will be restless and angry.
Sign up for a consultation with family psychologist Yashchenko S.A.
phone 303 20 60
We act strange with money
Business woman sitting at a bar. A man approaches her: “Hello!” Allow me to offer my company... - Why do you want to sell it?
Money training will show you your ways to avoid money. And their reasons. Wastefulness, gambling, losses are active ways to get rid of it. Refusal to work, illness, depression, alcoholism are passive.
Discuss financial issues in the family - like politicians, not like dictators. Conduct an opinion poll and change contracts at least once a year. Know how to listen to your loved ones when they talk about money.
Discuss money in the family immediately and together.
Money can make you psychologically unhappy: if you demand money when you need love. Deal with love and money during the training.
“Curse: May you have a lot of money, but may you be the only one in your family who has it.” (directed by Ernst Lubitsch)
So that money does not spoil your life:
Riddle: To what question do Americans all answer as one: Of course!, and Russians - God forbid! Answer: To the question: Do you want to change places with the richest man in the country?
It is necessary to agree on the rules for distributing money in the family. All family members should know these rules by which money is distributed. Then there are fewer insults and misunderstandings.
The family should choose one day a year to make financial claims. There must be one, but only one. All the time, if discussed, it is destructive.
Clarity of family hierarchy (power system). Everyone should know who makes decisions about money and why they do it. This is either someone who knows how to make money and does it, or knows how to spend it sparingly.
Establish a statute of limitations - for example, 7 years - after which financial claims are considered invalid. And it makes sense to forgive the debtor so as not to turn life into hell.
In the family, give a little more than you take, do not bargain endlessly.
Ask yourself – is it really about the money? Or is money the psychological equivalent of love?
“Financing is the art of passing money from hand to hand until it disappears.” (financier Robert W. Sarnoff)
Rules for using money wisely:
Abramovich receives the Nobel Prize: a trifle, but nice.
A married couple must have a financial plan.
There is no perfect way to use money.
Flexibility improves relationships. No one is “obliged” to feel about money problems the way you do.
Being an adult means giving.
Just remember: giving means creating needs! Keep track of which ones you create? For example, instead of a computer console, it is better to buy your child a creativity kit.
If you give something as a gift, do not take it away as punishment, and do not scold it for damage. Otherwise, it is a “toothy” gift, a gift that gives you power. By giving in order to take away, you create resentment and anger. This is not a gift of free love, but the purchase of obedience.
The way you use money in relationships makes you love or despise yourself. This is the psychological background of money.
Attempts to re-educate each other are in vain. A mot will remain a mot. Miser - miser. Usually they live together, compensating for each other and provoking each other.
Remember, there is nothing wrong with money bringing joy.
Money can be a deterrent and reward, but for children it should only be used as a last resort, not for long, and not in all areas.
Money can serve as compensation for infidelity.
Everyone knows that money does not buy happiness, but everyone wants to see for themselves. MONEY training is not just a course of lectures on how to make more money easier, it is a practical change in your unconscious money scripts. This is a way to gain access to the experience of ancestors who knew how to make money easier and more.
Children and money:
The son comes up to his father and says: “Dad, I’m having a party today: I need money...” “Take it there, in the safe.” - How many ? - Five centimeters.
Don’t expect any return: our children will never owe us anything, they will give everything we give them to their children later: both money and love, that’s how life works. ... Therefore, give them as much as you don’t mind, no more.
Children should have pocket money appropriate to their age.
Children should participate in the financial life of the family and express their opinions, but you make the decision and you are responsible for the result. Train your children's money skills.
Develop useful needs in children. When choosing a gift, ask yourself: what does it teach my child, what does it develop in him?
Unconditional love: give for nothing, not for good behavior.
If you help you earn money, you get it: children can be paid for their work if they help you earn money.
Children should motivate their requests by why they want this particular thing.
Children should be entrusted with financial matters.
Children should know payment slips, banks, and salaries.
Distribute fairly. Motivate inequality.
Give - don't make promises.
Don't give out of guilt.
Children need to know what belongs to them and cannot be taken away. What belongs to the parents and use is limited by the rules. What is common?
Don't compete for gifts.
“If you have money, then you are wise, handsome, and can also sing well.” Jewish wisdom.
So you've learned a few secrets about how money works in a family. The psychology of money will help you become richer and happier. At the money training you will learn how to make money, we are ready to provide you with a course of lectures about money.
Sincerely, family psychologist S.A. Yashchenko
Sign up for a consultation with family psychologist Yashchenko S.A. or to the training “MONEY”
phone 303 20 60
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