When and why do men return?
Men returning to their former lover occurs for several reasons.
Old memories
The psychology of men during separation is such that at first the man feels a dizzying freedom. He starts going to parties again, drinking beer, surrounding himself with friends. But soon a painful melancholy comes. Random short-lived meetings with women bring little relief and seem meaningless. It turns out that the beloved always remained conscious.
Gradually, pleasant moments from the past become intrusive and deprive you of peace. The gentleman begins to think: it’s hard for the girl he loves without a strong man’s shoulder. The ex is jealous of potential new gentlemen and feels remorse for his own mistakes. After three weeks, the gentleman is overcome by real nostalgia, a great desire to renew the relationship. And he returns.
Longing for a lost relationship is often an explanation for why an ex-wife reminds her of herself. According to the psychologist, it is more difficult for women to forget past love.
Remember! Men perceive information with their eyes. Therefore, social networks (especially Instagram with a bunch of photos) greatly enhance old memories. As soon as a man looks at a VKontakte page, pictures of a girl, strong memories suddenly awaken, a great desire appears to start dating again, living together, making plans. That's why the ex-boyfriend begins to remind himself. The psychology of men is designed this way.
Unsuccessful attempts to find a woman similar to an ex-lover
After a long period of stability, it is psychologically extremely difficult for a man to find a partner. He actually formed a certain stereotype about the ideal lover. Finding a woman who meets the right requirements becomes very difficult. In the new lady, the gentleman subconsciously tries to see his former beloved, and constantly stumbles upon inconsistencies.
In general, looking for a new partner after many years of relationship is difficult. Representatives of the stronger sex quickly get used to the comfortable position when the woman is “already here, conquered.” That is why the former lover first reminds of himself, then returns to his beloved. The psychology of men gives rise to rather predictable actions.
The guy often constantly visits and corresponds. Going through all the stages of a relationship again, getting used to a girl and new requirements is not an easy task. Men quickly get used to good things; the stronger half of humanity is attracted by the lost “comfort zone”, the former lover. By the way, this also explains why the ex-wife reminds of herself. The psychology of both sexes is very similar regarding relationships after a breakup.
Why do you dream about your ex-beloved boyfriend?
A former lover in a dream symbolizes disappointment, mistrust, and fear.
Or in a new relationship you make old mistakes. Most often, it is excessive affection, a desire for total control, the belief that your loved one is a part of you. Obsessive dreams in which a former young man is present indicate an inextricable emotional connection with him. This will have a negative impact on new relationships, since part of your vital energy, in fact, goes into the past. If the relationship has long been in the past, and the dream book’s ex-boyfriend continues to “pay visits” in dreams, then from a psychological point of view this is a symbol of preserving feelings and secret hope for renewing the relationship. Often the answer to the question of why an ex-boyfriend dreams or why an ex-boyfriend dreams lies on the surface: if the lovers broke up because of a stupid quarrel, but in the present there is regret about the breakup.
However, it is possible that the girl is simply subconsciously analyzing her personal life. For example, he compares his current partner with his ex. The better the ex-boyfriend appears and the warmer and more tender the feelings towards him in a dream, the more dissatisfied the owner of the dream is with her personal life or with her current partner.
If the ex-boyfriend dreamed of being sad or sick, but before that the girl had never seen her ex-boyfriend in a dream, whom she also loved before, it means that he thinks and remembers about her, perhaps even with longing. The same can be said about former lovers and cohabitants, if in real life the woman is happy with someone else.
It also happens that you often dream of an ex-boyfriend with whom there is a stormy showdown: disputes, reproaches, scandals. This means that this relationship was not brought to its logical conclusion, so the consciousness of the sleeping woman continues a silent dialogue with her former partner, plays out various situations associated with this person, etc.
According to the dream book, an ex-boyfriend wants to come back, more often it means a desire for this to happen in reality, less often it foreshadows news from him. The way he looks and behaves will be a reflection of his true essence, and your attitude will be a projection of your actual feelings towards him. Any dream in which the ex-boyfriend returned, according to the dream book, means longing for him.
The dream book interprets a dream in which an ex gets married as an unconscious letting go of his image. But if the dream is intrusive, you cannot forget the old feelings, although you understand their futility. The internal conflict that gives rise to this phenomenon is actually caused by low self-esteem. An unexpected dream about the wedding of an ex-boyfriend whom you forgot to even think about can be an alarming omen - something is going wrong in the current relationship, there are factors that undermine their stability.
If in a dream an ex-boyfriend appears with a new girlfriend, and you are happy about this or are indifferent, expect an interesting acquaintance in the near future. A new hobby will appear in your life. A strong feeling of jealousy means the desire to constantly compare oneself with others, suffering from inferiority.
Why dream of kissing your ex-boyfriend means failure in love. This will be caused by the desire to dominate the relationship and fill only the entire living space of the partner. This often manifests itself as a painful desire to return past feelings, to become needed again.
Making love to your ex-boyfriend in a dream is an expression of not only affection for him, but also a projection of your attitude towards love in general. Posture is of great importance. Face to face - an attitude towards an equal union. If this was not the case in the past, in a dream you work on your mistakes, rebuilding your psyche.
The woman on top symbolizes the authoritarian position, which was the cause of the breakup. The man behind – on the contrary, his dominance or cruelty, the desire to obey him in everything. In this case, you either constantly choose the position of the victim, or you greatly regret that you did not give in to attempts to change you.
Looking for an ex-boyfriend in a dream represents emotional immersion in past relationships; you spend too much time on memories and analysis of your behavior. Most likely, you blame yourself for the breakup. Searching for and not finding a former loved one, calling and not getting through, calling him and not getting through to him - all this means that there are no reciprocal aspirations. You have long been forgotten, while you yourself cannot let go.
A hug from an ex-boyfriend in a dream is a symbol of either saying goodbye to him or escaping to an idealized past. In the second case, you do not know how to accept the situation as it is, and now you are experiencing a lack of warmth and acceptance from someone close to you.
When an ex-boyfriend declares his love in a dream, this actually indicates infantilism and immaturity, which interfere with building harmonious relationships in the present. Most likely, you are looking for ways to assert yourself; do not expect happiness in love in the near future.
If your ex-boyfriend asks for forgiveness in a dream, it is quite possible that he will soon remind you of himself in reality. Such a dream is the first sign of emotional letting go and liberation; you will no longer energetically feed the past.
We invite you to read: Why do women dream about bedbugs?
An ex gives flowers in a dream - a sign of pleasant changes. You will start an affair, or old relationships may be rekindled.
A dream in which an ex-boyfriend died means the final severance of the emotional connection with him, preparation for a new stage in life. This is how a strong desire to forget the past manifests itself.
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Quite a lot of time has passed, my personal life has long been playing with new colors, and suddenly I have a dream with my ex-boyfriend in the leading role. Why would this be and what is it for? Girls are impressionable and active people, and without delay, they go to dream books for answers.
Dreams about an ex-lover may mean that in real life a woman is not satisfied with her current love relationship or even the absence of one. This may also mean that she still experiences old feelings, but does not admit it even to herself.
Sometimes it happens that despite a long separation, an unbreakable spiritual connection remains between people who once separated. In this case, a dream about a former loved one foreshadows a date with him in the near future in reality.
She dreams that a former friend of her heart gives something to the dreamer, but there is nothing under the gift wrapping - this is a symbol of the insincerity of the current partner. If the gift is bright red, then this completely marks his betrayal.
In order to interpret a dream as accurately as possible, you need to remember all its details, including the most insignificant ones at first glance. Perhaps the essence of the message from the subtle worlds encrypted in night vision is hidden in the little things.
To see an ex-boyfriend in a dream who asks for forgiveness - old grievances have not yet completely passed and periodically remind themselves. Most likely, this is the result of an unresolved painful situation that is played out by the subconscious over and over again.
A dream in which a former beloved guy appears in the company of his new girlfriend promises the dreamer a new interesting acquaintance, which in the future will flow into a very significant relationship.
If you dream that your ex-boyfriend wants to start over and renew a long-broken connection, it means that soon some people or objects will remind the dreaming girl of the days gone by. Such a dream should not be interpreted directly - in reality, the guy in the dream may not even remember the dreamer.
What does it portend?
In a dream, the ex-boyfriend bursts into tears - perhaps something bad is happening to him in reality or will happen soon. If the friendly relationship has been preserved, you can tell him about your dream and try to warn him.
A dream filled with happiness and joy, where the separated couple seemed to never say goodbye, may mean that oblivion is close - the unpleasant aftertaste from the negative events of the past will finally dissipate and will soon disappear completely.
If the separation occurred due to the death of a guy, then seeing him in a dream means that some kind of trouble awaits. Seeing a former loved one walking away symbolizes liberation from outdated attachments, and the readiness to let new love into the heart.
Whether a particular dream was interpreted in a positive or not so positive way, it is important not to take everything too seriously. Any dream book is just a collection of assumptions of its compiler. And an assumption is not yet a statement.
When trying to figure out why your ex-beloved boyfriend is dreaming, you can turn to dream books or psychology and discover many different interpretations of the same dream. Isn’t it better to try to understand for yourself what your own subconscious wanted to say? You just need to listen to your inner voice.
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After a breakup, it can be difficult for us to get rid of thoughts about our ex-other half. It often manifests itself through dreams in which you see an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend. Many people believe that such a dream means that your ex is still thinking about you and he still has some feelings for you, but in reality such situations are extremely rare.
What is your dream really telling you? To understand this issue, try to remember in detail everything that happened in the dream, then read our article, which contains the most complete collection of dream interpretations.
With us you can find exactly your events related to your ex-boyfriend in a dream, and get the most reliable and accurate interpretation of your dreams, thanks to the fact that we take into account all aspects and draw up the most complete picture of the interpretation.
You can say your farewell words once, turn around and leave. However, deep down in her soul, the girl begins to be drawn to old meetings, especially if the ex-boyfriend himself decided to end the relationship that was important to her. Therefore, the continuation of a relationship is often dreamed of after a breakup. As a rule, the person in love begins to miss him, the guy becomes, as before, affectionate and gentle, hugs her, kisses her, or she herself begins to drive him away, but he cannot approach her.
- The dream book does not interpret such dreams, since they are simply considered unreacted emotions to separation. In the real world, they do not foretell changes; on the contrary, longing, pain about loss and regret begin in the morning.
- To distinguish such a dream from a real prediction, pay attention to the actions in the dream.
- If you really wanted affection and for him to kiss you and you dream about it, this is simply compensation for the desire. But if you dreamed about your ex-boyfriend being affectionate when you don’t want him to be, this is already a dream with meaning.
- Sometimes a girl dreams that she screams at him, quarrels with him and drives him away herself.
We invite you to read: Dream Interpretation of lying with a man on the website Dream Interpretation Guru
Why does a man remind himself of himself: the psychology of men
According to psychologists, a former beloved man or husband sometimes imposes his own person for the following reasons.
- He wants to figure out whether the lady’s feelings have faded.
Wants to find out if you are yearning for lost love. That’s why he writes messages and congratulates him on the holidays. The guy does this in order to restore his shaky self-esteem, to feel that his beloved is nearby. Or the partner still has feelings, the man wants to renew the relationship.
- Banal sexual dissatisfaction.
Why does your ex-boyfriend remind you of himself? The psychologist's answer is simple: one of the reasons is a lack of sex. The desire to meet only sometimes is often prosaic. The gentleman simply lacks his previous sexual activity. The stronger sex quickly gets used to a certain “sexual rhythm”. If your husband or lover has had sex for several years in a row at least a couple of times a week, it’s difficult to readjust. Banal sexual hunger will make you call and invite you to a “conciliatory” date.
Why do exes remind you of themselves? Psychology says: it is very difficult to build a normal relationship with a man who “returns” simply to satisfy his libido. Be smart. When your ex-lover pesters you with calls in the evenings wanting to come over to satisfy your “basic instinct,” keep your cool. Yes, sex brings you closer, but this is a different case. Therefore, agree to meet only during your lunch break. Such a date excludes sex. This way you will quickly understand the true intentions of a man: does he just want to satisfy his sexual instinct, or does he really want to return to you.
How to ask a man correctly
“I myself” - eradicate this phrase from your vocabulary and life.
After the request to buy a new dress, the girl went and bought it herself, without waiting, and at the same time making an offended face. Who benefited from this? Decide on your position.
Or ask a man, and he does it. Or don't ask and do it yourself. Which option is closer to women's happiness (and men's too)?
Reminding a man about a request is normal.
What to pay attention to when a man shows up after a breakup?
The following things will help you make sure: your beloved or husband returned because he loves you. Selfishness, the desire to improve shaky self-esteem, to feel more psychologically comfortable have nothing to do with it.
- The returning man is actively making plans.
He talks about a future together, hints: he’s ready to start a family. This is a serious sign: the gentleman has firmly decided to throw in his lot with you.
- The gentleman has changed.
A man truly loves if he has rethought the reasons for the breakup, admitted his own mistakes, and sincerely strives to improve.
If a couple does not want to renew their relationship, but the separation has somehow affected their mental state - fears, panic attacks, bouts of depression or terrible self-doubt have appeared - we recommend contacting a psychologist - hypnologist Nikita Valerievich Baturin.
